Sexual Orientation & Sexual Violence

Every survivor’s story of victimization, recovery, and healing is unique—because every human is unique. Everything that makes you who you are also contributes to the way you process a traumatic experience like sexual abuse or assault.

Understanding Sexual Orientation

Sexual orientation describes the types of connections and relationships someone finds romantically and physically fulfilling. People express sexual orientation in many ways, including through consensual sex, physical intimacy, emotional closeness, shared experiences, and long-term commitment.

Sexual orientation is central to many people’s sense of self, encompassing identities such as lesbian, gay, bisexual, heterosexual, and more.

How Sexual Orientation Intersects with Trauma

As with characteristics such as age, disability status, and background, sexual orientation shades the lens through which we see the world. When that “worldview lens” is damaged by a traumatic experience, our ability to build and maintain healthy interpersonal connections can also become damaged. And without fulfilling relationships, our sense of self can erode.

This is just one example of the tremendous harm caused by sexual violence.

Sexual Orientation & Seeking Help

People of every sexual orientation experience sexual violence, but not all survivors receive the same support. Many factors contribute to a survivor’s support experience, and sexual orientation can play a particularly big role.

A 2023 Gallup poll revealed that 85.6% of Americans identify as heterosexual or straight, making heterosexuality the most common sexual orientation. (1) Because most people identify as heterosexual, non-heterosexual survivors may face unique challenges when seeking medical, law enforcement, legal, or other support resources.

Sexual Orientation & Barriers To Help

Disbelief. You may encounter people who believe sexual violence doesn’t affect people like you. Honor your intuition and trust your instincts. What you experienced was real, and you deserve to be believed and supported.
Confusion. If your experience didn’t align with your assumptions about sexual violence, you may feel unsure if what happened to you was even a crime. Don’t let uncertainty keep you from getting the help you need.
Disclosure. Talking about sexual assault is always difficult, and it can be even more challenging if you haven’t openly shared your sexual orientation. Take advantage of resources designed specifically for people like you.
Dismissal. Some communities refuse to support survivors of certain sexual orientations. This can compound the pain a survivor feels and prevent them from obtaining critical care. Seek out communities that will welcome you as you are.

You may also experience complex emotions, like shame, guilt, or feeling alone.

But you are not alone.

RAINN’s National Sexual Assault Hotline is available to all U.S.-based survivors 24/7/365.

Sexual Violence Statistics by Sexual Orientation

In 2023, the CDC reported on The National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey, which asked people about their experiences with contact sexual violence, a term that encompasses all forms of unwanted sexual contact, including rape, forced penetration, and sexual coercion. (2)

KEY FINDINGS (3)

Approximately 3 in 5 lesbian women, 4 in 5 bisexual women, and half of heterosexual women in the U.S. experienced some form of CSV during their lifetimes
Over half of gay men and bisexual men and about 3 in 10 heterosexual men in the U.S. experienced CSV during their lifetimes
4 in 5 (almost 80%) bisexual women and over 56% of bisexual men reported experiencing contact sexual violence in their lifetimes
3 in 5 (almost 60%) of both lesbian women and gay men reported experiencing contact sexual violence
Over 53% of heterosexual women and over 29% of heterosexual men reported experiencing contact sexual violence
More than 1 in 4 lesbian women and almost 2 in 4 bisexual women reported to researchers they experienced rape during their lifetimes
About a quarter of gay men and 3% of heterosexual men reported to researchers they experienced rape during their lifetimes
One in 4 gay men and 1 in 5 bisexual men were made to penetrate someone else during their lifetimes

Supporting Every Survivor

The reaction of the first person a survivor tells can determine whether they reach out for additional help and resources. If someone discloses that they’ve experienced sexual abuse or assault, your response can make all the difference.

HOW TO HELP

Listen. Drop what you are doing and give the survivor your full attention. You don’t need to understand everything that happened to say, “I believe you,” and “It’s not your fault.”
Validate their feelings. Statements like “I’m glad you felt you could share this with me,” or “You didn’t do anything to deserve this,” can help a survivor feel stronger.
Communicate care. Tell the survivor in no uncertain terms that you care about them. Use clear statements like “I’m here for you,” or “You matter to me.”
Do not ask for details about the assault. Even if you simply want to fully understand the survivor’s experience, avoid pressing for details about what occurred. If the survivor chooses to share details with you, listen without judgment.

SOURCES

(1) Gallup. (2024).

(2) Chen, J., Khatiwada, S., Chen, M. S., Smith, S. G., Leemis, R. W., Friar, N., Basile, K. C., and Kresnow, M. (2023). The National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey (NISVS) 2016/2017: Report Atlanta, GA: National Center for Injury Prevention and Control, Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

(3) National Sexual Violence Resource Center. (2023).